Drug Commercial: Pryonx helps you overcome the side effects of Pryonz
As we at Not the Sun are not bound by the rules of traditional journalism, we can run drug commercials. What, the regular news can run drug commercials? Well, we can run fringe drugs that were approved by the FDA over the weekend.
Pryonx helps you overcome the side effects of Pryonz. Are you experiencing dizziness or headaches? This could be the result of taking Pryonz. There is a solution for these issues caused by Pryonz, Pryonx.
Pryonx has a few minor side effects like dry mouth, indigestion, hypersalivation, gastrointestinal hypomotility, rhabdomyolysis, serotonin syndrome, agranulocytosis, and more. If you don’t know these big words don’t worry that is why we chose them. We are hoping you don’t know the pain our drugs could lead to.
We also ask that you please inform your doctor if you die. If you should die you should immediately stop taking Pryonx, because it is currently only approved for the living, but we are currently working on bribing FDA officials to approve it for dead people. This is a huge untapped market.
These drug ads are very lucrative for us and we will work on in-article placement as well. Since we make up the articles we can easily slip in product placement. In fact stay tuned for Pryonx showing up in other articles.
