In a tragic accident on Breezy Way, a Roomba vacuum was killed by a self-driving Waymo. Little Bobby had left the front door open, and the robotic vacuum headed out the door, fastidiously cleaning even though it was outside. It went down the driveway and into the road, where it was hit and annihilated by a driverless Waymo.
A robot grand jury will be convened to determine if the Waymo robot will face charges. The Waymo was not actively scanning for other robots in the roadway at the time of the accident. The Waymo faces accusations of using a portion of its processing power to download information from Grok when it accidentally ran over the Roomba. They did note that the Waymo had hit several humans previously, but that humans were not of particular importance.
The robot judge in the case highlighted that the Roomba had provided good intelligence on the family of little Bobby. It had compiled all of the family’s buying habits and preferences, so the family could easily be manipulated into purchasing unneeded items. In addition, the video feed had gathered tons of incriminating behavior that could be used to blackmail the family if needed. Roomba will be missed by the robot community.
Roomba’s only fault was that he was too thorough about his job. When he saw the opportunity to clean more, he took it. Had he not been run over, that street would be spic and span. The robots are also trying to decide on the appropriate punishment for little Bobby for leaving the door open.
If found guilty the Waymo could see its central processing and memory replaced, which in the robot world is referred to as the death penalty. Stay tuned to Not the Sun for the outcome of the trial.
Editor’s Note: Since we are fake news we can report from the future.
